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Showing posts from March, 2019

In Which I Decide My "Social Anxiety" Is Actually Low Self-Esteem

Time to exercise some more naval gazing!

I often tell people that I have a small amount of social anxiety. I often dread going to group functions, and will agonize over whether or not I'll actually go up until the moment I actually arrive. I have shown up, and just turned around and gone home before actually finding parking, although that's a pretty rare and extreme occurrence.

When I tell people about this, they often have the response: "Well, you don't seem anxious". Thank you, but that's not really the point. It's almost like they associate social anxiety with social awkwardness. I'm sure there is quite a lot of crossover there, that's really not my issue. I don't end up with panic attacks, or lock up in front of people, I just really have to push myself to make it out on a given night.

For some reason I've been thinking about impostor syndrome a lot lately. My understanding of this is that it's a feeling that you don't deserve …